A new love in your life or shifts in your home can be a big challenge for everyone, including your dog. Regardless of if you are going through a breakup or have a new partner becoming part of your life, it’s essential to think about how your dog is handling the changes in your home and family. Dogs can be sensitive to changes, especially when it comes to people in and out of the family/home. Some dogs take a new love in your life in stride, while other dogs will become stressed or anxious.
Breaking up
If your dog has gotten used to your partner being around a lot, a breakup can be very confusing. If you and your partner are breaking up, it’s essential to be thoughtful about how your dog will handle the change in the home. If this is a person who your dog is used to spending a lot of time with or around, they may emotionally struggle with the breakup as well. If your ex has been living with you or has a lot of belongings at your house, make sure that your dog is with you or that you are home while your ex is moving out so that you can make sure your dog doesn’t accidentally dart out a door.
If you and your ex-partner are on good terms, consider ways you can work together to support your dog during the changes. If your dog has a close relationship with your ex, consider scheduling times for going on a walk together or letting them come to visit your dog.
Introducing someone new
If you’re dating someone new, it’s a good idea to be intentional about introductions to your dog. This is especially important if your dog is wary of strangers or anxious about meeting new people. In this case, plan for when the new love in your life will be meeting your dog. Plan an introduction for a time when you’ll be able to focus on your dog and ensure they are comfortable with your new person. Consider meeting up in a neutral public space for a walk and let your dog get used to spending time with your new partner before spending time together in the home.
Give space
If you have a new love in your life, give your dog space to warm up to your new person at their own time and pace. Just because you are enamored with the new person doesn’t mean your dog will automatically be as well. Especially if you know your dog can be shy, give your dog time to warm up to your new person at their own pace. Don’t force your dog to cuddle, play, or interact with your new date. Make sure that your dog has their own space, like a bed, crate, or area of your home where your dog can retreat to while you and your new partner are hanging out. If you and your new partner want some private time, give your dog a hollow toy stuffed with treats and food or a dog-safe chew to occupy them on their bed or in their crate.
Maintain routines
If you have a new partner or are going through a breakup, try to maintain your dog’s routines as much as possible. Don’t start spending the night at your new partner’s house or skipping your dog’s favorite activities like training classes, or walks. Changes in your dog’s level of exercise or routine can lead to stress, boredom, and anxiety, which may manifest in negative, destructive behaviors. Dogs thrive on routines and maintaining your dog’s regular schedule as much as possible will help your dog to adjust to your ex moving out or to develop positive associations with a new partner being in your life.
Regardless of if you have a new partner or are going through a breakup, make sure that you are prioritizing spending quality time with your dog. Dogs can pick up on their people’s emotions and so if you are sad after a breakup, your dog may be concerned about your changes in behavior and act clingier. On the other hand, if you are distracted by a new partner, your dog may be confused by your change in behavior. As your relationship status changes, prioritize spending quality time with your dog and maintaining their routines.
Get support
Suppose you find that your dog is struggling with forming a positive connection to a new partner coming into your life or is distressed after a breakup and a now ex-partner not being around anymore. In that case, it’s always a good idea to reach out for support. A dog trainer who utilizes positive reinforcement training techniques can help assess your dog’s behavior around the new person in your life and support you around any challenges that are coming up.
If you know your dog is uncomfortable with strangers, you can even proactively work with a trainer to support creating a plan to introduce your dog to your new partner. A trainer can also support you with developing training and management strategies for helping your dog adjust to a partner who has moved out and any other relationship shifts in your home.
